POSITION: The Equality in Marriage Institute advocates that all couples before they wed sign a prenuptial agreement (marriage contract) pledging a 50-50 partnership and update it throughout their union. Married couples without such agreements should create one.

BACKGROUND: Many people planning marriage set aside time to plan the ceremony, reception, cake and flowers, but avoid discussions about what kind of marital partnership they want and how they will answer important questions that will affect the future of their union. Because money is the number one reason that married couples argue, it is important to set forth some guidelines about how the couple will handle their finances. Even if a couple starts off with few marital assets, it is likely they will acquire many in the course of their marriage.

A marital agreement, called a prenuptial agreement if drawn up before the wedding, may be as simple as a written statement, signed by both partners, which says, "I love, trust and respect you and have chosen for you to be my life partner. Should our union be dissolved, any assets accumulated during the time of our marriage will be divided equally, that is 50-50." Agreements can also go into great detail about what kind of partnership the couple wants to have. For an agreement to be respected by the courts, it should be drawn up by lawyers (one representing each partner) according to the couple's wishes. Agreements also must be signed well in advance of the wedding ceremony to avoid any claims later of coercion.

Prenuptial agreements are even more important for older couples who have accumulated certain assets of their own and for couples who have been married before. Couples with children from previous marriages can use marital agreements to protect assets for their children.

Married couples may write and sign marital agreements at anytime in their marriage if they did not do so before marrying. If they want their agreement to be recognized as a legal contract, each must be represented by a separate attorney. Critics of marriage contracts claim that such agreements encourage divorce by recognizing the possibility. But secular contracts, like religious marriage contracts that have been standard for centuries, serve as a clear statement of rights and responsibilities within marriage and protect the partners should the union end.

PERSONAL ACTION: If you are planning marriage or are married, make sure you have a marital agreement or contract. If you have one already, make sure you update it regularly, particularly if you move to another state. Remember, marriage and divorce laws vary from state to state.

Check out our guidebook, The Commitment Conversation to start the process.

SOCIAL ACTION: Suggest that your school system, religious institution or community center include a unit on the importance of marriage contracts supporting 50-50 partnerships in any courses given on marriage. Help arrange for free legal advice for couples unable to afford the expense of two attorneys.

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